The time of atonement
is nigh. Oh the wrath of the invincible. The overpowering
encumbrance dwelling in the bowels of the vanquished. To seat on the
throne of martyrdom and strain for release of all circumscription.
To agonize in forbearance with inflaming intestinal fortitude. Have
mercy upon mercy upon us for we have sinned, we have sinned. We have
eaten from the tendril free brawn of the earth and have been loath to
drink from the rippling brooks of deliverance. Oh, woe is us, woe is us, these infernal hemorrhoids.
We seat ourselves on
our beloved D7 and bounce on the cold metal seat in anguish. Does
anyone hear our voice and supplications. No one hath inclined his
ear unto us, therefore will we loath compassion as long as we live.
The sorrows of anguish compassed us, and the pains of hell gat hold
upon us, and we found only trouble and sorrow. So called we upon our
thundering ancient D7, oh omnipotent D7, we beseech thee, numb our
bum to this abhorrent torment.
Gracious is our D7, and
righteous; yea, our D7 is merciful. It has walked us through the
valleys of the shadows of despair, we will not be afraid of the
throes of adversity, because it is with us, it's palpitations and ice
chilling podium, they comfort us. Our D7 preserveth the simple, we
were brought low, and it befriended us. Return unto rest, oh our
entrails, for our D7 hath dealt bountifully with us. For it hast
delivered our soul from tribulation, our eyes from tears, and our
feet from writhing.
We will walk again in
the land of the living. We believed, therefore we were vindicated.
Yes, we were greatly afflicted. We said in our haste, all beasts are
traitors. What shall we render unto our stolid D7 for all it's
benevolence toward us? We shall take the cup of STP, and anoint it
upon the grease permeated fissures in our beloved engine, in hopes a
little will betroth itself within the voluminous oil pan. Thusly
will we pay our vows unto unto our omnipotent D7 now in the presence
of all it's sublimity. Oh our D7, truly we are thy servant, thou
hast loosed our bonds. We will offer to thee this sacrifice of
thanksgiving, and in our hour of need we will surely again call upon
thee to bestow upon our bottom the freedom from tribulation. Praise
to our D7.
We instill upon ye all
to keep the pot covered, harken ye all.
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